My Phone Number is Unlisted
As a blogger, do you ever feel sort of odd that anyone and everyone from your past and present can find you, learn all about your current life, and figure out how to contact you easily, with just a click of their mouse?
I do a little. My phone number really is unlisted. I have one family member who I’d like to avoid, so I’m unlisted. I’d rather she not know how to contact me, and I especially don’t want her knowing where I live. However, recently, someone from my past did contact me, and it made me realize that as a blogger, an unlisted phone number is small change; I’m just not that hard to find.
The person who contacted me was not some good pal I had back in the day either, or some cute story like a cool ex boyfriend looking me up, it was someone I hadn’t seen since the age of maybe 12, and I could have gone the rest of my life with it that way.
The person who contacted me knew a lot about me, which is not that hard a task if you know how to use Google. At this point, I’ve been blogging and doing web copy for so long, that I’m running pages and pages long on search engines. Obviously I’m not as popular a search as some folks are, but I’m around enough that you can learn a lot about me with one search. It felt weird to know this person knew all about me, but that I knew nothing about her.
So, how do you deal with being all over the web? Here’s what I will and won’t do online:
I will:
- Use my full name.
- Say the state I live in.
- Share pictures or videos of my world - so long as they don’t give away my street sign or the front of my house or something.
- Talk about my life pretty honestly (see below for what I won’t discuss).
- Share my opinions, even if I think others might not agree. That’s blogging folks; also, I’m like that in the real offline world too so…
I won’t:
- Give my phone number anywhere online.
- Give my address.
- Give random personal info - bank accounts, social security, etc.
- Name exact places I’m going - i.e. I’ll say, “My son and I are taking off to the park” but not, “My son and I are taking off to Bush Park in downtown Salem, Oregon.”
- Use full names of other people I know in my offline world - either past or present. That’s not cool. For example, I might say, “I used to have this friend named Bob, he was awesome…” but not, “I have this friend Bob Brown in Albuquerque who works at…” That’s not my info to give. I know some bloggers do share info like this, but it makes me uncomfortable.
- Share everything: For example, I won’t blog major family issues. I’ll say, “I don’t like this person” or “I try to avoid so and so” but I’d never say, “My son’s dad cheated on me with ten girls and spent three years addicted to the sauce” - he didn’t, by the way, but you see what I mean. Why get so personal? Yeah, I get miffed with the ex, but being all vindictive online is sort of petty and lame in my opinion. Again, I know bloggers who will give everything away, but talking serious smack about people (ex evil mother-in-law excluded) is just not something I do.
What it all comes down to:
I don’t have many past demons. If I did, it’s very likely I wouldn’t be working online. I’ve been pretty lucky in that I don’t have a bunch of ex mates I parted badly with. Except for one early overly dramatic high school boyfriend, I always got along pretty well with an ex after a break up. I don’t have any weird old friend dramas to deal with or enemy co-workers from past jobs. All in all, I can only think of one or two people from my past who I’d rather not hear from, and there’s nothing I’m trying to keep hidden in my past (like say, illegal activity).
If you’re considering blogging full-time, it might be smart to consider your past and future contacts and behaviors. If your past is littered with oodles of people you’d rather not hear from, or you’ve done super shady stuff; stuff that you don’t want broadcast online, then blogging might not be for you. If you’re uncomfortable being easy to find, then blogging is absolutely not for you.
What do you think? Are you uncomfortable with the thought of being all over the Internet and easy to find? AND how do you keep your life somewhat your own, even if you have an online presence?
Blogging Parents: What Are You Doing During the Summer?
Just curious, because I know many blogging parents. If you’re a full-time blogging parent… Do you put your kids in camp? Hire help (either for work, or for childcare)? Or do you just try to manage by working nights and weekends?
I’ve been considering camp, but today my son flipped about it. We’re a single parent homeschooling family (as I’ve noted) so I’m used to balancing work with my son Cedar. However, his dad is currently being stingy with helping out (it’s his busy season at work) and I did think day camp would give me a nice break; as in a little more work time. However, Cedar doesn’t want to go and has actually struck up a deal with me - odd for a seven year old, I know. We’re going to try out a new schedule; from 9pm to 11pm I get work time - uninterrupted work time. He says he’ll draw or sleep or play with toys and let me work. In his words, “I’ll try to remember you have to work.”
We’ll see.
Right now, we’re trying it out for a week or two, and then, simply because I need more work time, if he can’t manage being on his own for those two hours, he’ll do day camp a few days a week. Also, I’ve decided to quit one job. So, my summer schedule is semi-figured out. Is yours? If you’re a full-time blogging parent how do you manage to get it all done? Kids and work. Especially in the summer if your kids are normally in school. Let me know.
Wasting Time While Blogging
We all waste time at work sometimes, and usually a little time wasted does no harm. However, I literally have no time to waste. I get two full days to work, period, each week. I’m a single work-at-home mama, who homeschools, so time is tight. My son’s dad has our son Friday evenings through Sunday evenings which is when I do the bulk of my work – that by the way means; I try to get everything done for the upcoming week (currently about 3 articles and enough posts for around 10 blogs). It’s near impossible. Actually it is impossible. I’ve never, not once, had a week where I get it all done on the weekend.
Partly, this is because I’m working with a small amount of time, but also I waste some of my time. Last week I made a list of all the ways I waste time.
- Not knowing what to blog about first.
- Email, or should I say EMAIL!
- Moderating and responding to blog comments.
- Breaks during work hours.
- Getting side tracked while posting.
- Forums.
- Sleep, meals, and exercise.
- Twitter.
Some of these problems are larger than others. I also jotted down some solutions, including some solutions directly related me only having two days to work in the first place.
Over the next couple of days I’ll be posting my solutions – and how they’re working. I put some into motion this weekend. If you’re wasting time in the same ways that I do, or if you’re a single work-at-home parent maybe my solutions will help you to improve your productivity too.
What ways are you wasting time during work hours?
Don’t Forget Your Sense of Humor
Before I forget, happy Blogger Appreciation Day! Show another blogger how he or she is appreciated by offering encouragement and support.
Yesterday I chatted for a bit with another network blogger who was a bit down about the direction her blog was taking. As a health blogger who discussed a chronic condition she felt her posts, and her community’s comments about their health issues, was bringing the community. She felt her blog was so depressing she didn’t want to do it anymore. A couple of other bloggers chimed in and we discussed ways to add positivity to the blog. Especially through humor.
I think as bloggers we feel our primary goal is to teach, but it’s also to entertain. There are people who come to read our blogs not to learn something new, but to read and interact. Humor is a great way to encourage positivity and get some great comments rolling.
The benefits of using humor in your blog posts:
- Humor makes people smile and laugh. It makes them want to show your post to others and encourages them to come back for more humor.
- Laughter is contagious. Laughing makes people positive and upbeat.
- Humor shows a human side. People like to see you’re not perfect or that the same things happen to all of you. "Slice of life" humor is always well received.
- Humor helps others to forget about their problems for a while.
- Humor lets us all stop taking ourselves seriously for a while.
- Humor breaks up the day.
How to use humor in your blog posts:
- Tell a funny story or anecdote.
- Find a funny video.or
- Ask readers for their own funny stories.
- Look for humorous cartoons or articles and bring them to the attention of your readers.
I think bloggers forget they don’t always have to be serious. Bloggers who discuss topics such as illnesses or sad topics especially have to be careful not to become too depressing. Don’t forget to inject a little humor in your blog posts. Watch and see the difference it makes with your community.
Is Blogging Really This Dangerous?
My pal Kori sent me this piece from the New York Times a couple of hours ago. Scary stuff - go read it, then come back and we’ll chat.
Honestly, this article sort of freaked me out. While I do love blogging, this article covered a lot of the negatives. Long hours, the constant story hunt, links, networking, no time to eat when I’m in full on work mode, and more. Some of this stuff is scarily true.
It’s worse when you’re on someone else’s dime too. I remember blogging just for me, back in the day. The big difference was that if I felt like stopping, taking a break, I could. I did. I do remember blog breaks. Now, blogging for others, supporting my son with blogging, I rarely have time to breathe when it’s work time. I just don’t stop.
Recently (last month) I realized that something had to give. I sat down with my schedule to think things over. Among other things I went down to part-time at one position and dropped another gig altogether. We’ll have less money immediately, but in the long run, I’ll be more productive at the blogs I’m keeping.
I have some other ideas as well. If you’re a frazzled blogger here are some things that may work:
Read more
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